Tonight I drove home from work in a snow storm. The world looking like a Lite-Brite smeared behind cold glass. The snow flakes just pouring down under street lights in every direction. Sugar rain from an endless source.
And I thought to myself… “Abundance.”
And then I felt that each snowflake that landed on my car brought something that I needed into my life. Each a solution, a blessing, or surprise.
One for a peaceful house when I get home. One for words that untie the tangles in my soul. One for the exercise my body is craving. One for every single person who will feed me their soul-chips.
Countless specks for love and laughter. Some for the music that soothes me. Some for joys, some for strength, some for ease. Some for the way through uncertainty.
On and on it went. A lifetime of everything I need landing on me. Even the things I can’t name yet or things that may never have a name. Even the things that have come and I’ve forgotten them but they left a kind of peace.
Endless, endless, endless, support in each landing. Until soon each crystal drew a whisper from my love drenched heart.
A soft and happy “Thanks.”
For Kim, Priestess of Pronoia – who taught me this concept with falling leaves.
Long showers & candle light & self massage – you’re craving the sweet taste.. but really you know you’re craving love, touch, and warmth.
Don’t forget to feel – stop chasing “info” & “facts” and just fucking feel. “Know what you know, and if you don’t know something, know that its okay because it is the truth.” – Melody Beattie
Remember this is temporary – this may be what is true for you right now, but it is not all there is. “The truth will set you free…but first it will piss you off.” – Gloria Steinem
Drink Chamomile tea.
Eat food that is Alive – that means there is still a shred of life in it, it hasn’t been processed to death or over cooked. Life energy gives way to life energy – if you are feeling dead inside, don’t add more dead stuff to the mix.
Write – just write, even if its just a stupid list telling you what you already know (especially if what you know is gratitude.)
Reach out – write a letter, go to a meeting, send the same text to dozens of people in a desperate, honest, abrupt attempt to know you aren’t alone – send the message you would like to receive. We get what we give. (Hey _____ (one or all/any people I know) Hope you are doing awesome shit and taking good care of yourself. I really appreciate you.)
Go outside – or at the very least, LOOK outside. (the natural world is honest and longing to show you what’s real)
Don’t (just don’t) expect to know anything right now – this includes: what you’re doing, who you are, or where you’re going… “And I’ll be the most beautiful in this moment… or the most cynical and strange, I can always rearrange, I can always find myself just how I am.”
Stick to as many of your rituals as you can. (remember gratitude first thing in the A.M. work when it’s time to work, eat when it’s time to eat, dance when it’s time to dance, honor your quiet time rule after dinner, take your vitamins, brush your teeth, consult your planner)
Ponder the notion that Life is just a ride at some cosmic amusement park…
Find your most extreme feeling and counter it – If you feel cold (cold hands, cold thoughts, cold heart) give yourself warmth (hot tea, warm stories, self massage) If you’re feeling crazy – go to what/where you feel stability (a straight line, hang out with rocks, tree pose) If you feel unorganized and full of too much distraction – go to what/where you feel is quiet or systematic (your planner, the library, sweep the floors) etc.. “Immerse yourself in the energy of what you most desire” – Hiro Boga
Go to your guides – trust in signs, talk less & listen more, see what your superstars are saying – open your favorite book of daily meditations or poetry to a random page and read it.
Fall face first into the pillows and scream – then burn some sage and say “thanks.”
Stop taking yourself so seriously – for today, remove every label you have ever applied to yourself except HUMAN and STUDENT.
Commit to asking yourself these questions a week from now – for now just collect the information you’ll use to answer them.
Listen to your PMS playlist -Songs for when you need to relax and remember that you are AMAZING and life is about learning and growing.
“So many times I’ve wondered where I’ve gone, and how I found my way back in.” – Norah Jones