May it be here

May it be here,
In this life that screams “Mom, Mom, Mom!”
In the rushing breeze
And noisy trees.
May it be here,
In my sweat,
In my running shoes,
In the storm that could soak us.
May it be here,
Between bursts of rationality,
Probing themes of time and energy.
May it be here,
Among the aimless wanderers,
A park bench, and the weeds,
May it be here,
With sirens and rain in the distant air,
The wind whooshing more and more.
May it be here,
In this body, in these clothes,
With an empty belly,
And a stuffy nose.
May it be here,
That I live.
The children flying on swings to foreign lands.
With their quick feet and strong willful bellies,
A sacred power animating their forms.
Their stampeding-elephant wills, May sometimes make me feel as if I’ll be run over.
One child is a bird,
And one a Tarzan,
And I love this.
But I have to admit sometimes I don’t know how to be with them.
I forget myself in my exhaustion.
I front power plays, I bluff serenity.
Then I remember the power of intention.
And it is here in the panic and anxiety that I allow my heart to drink vats of gratefulness.
It is here I relearn to play their game,
A play inherited by the power that moves them, that power that moves me too.
It is here I find imperfection and grace and empowerment.
And it is here that resistance falls
And the drama in my mind settles like dust.
I smell rain and am awash with a sense of knowing
I borrow their hearts and their ears
May it be here
That I live.

dad’s poem

These tendencies surface boldly from within,
some from the day I started breathing,
some from the times I lost my wind..
I pull them close and feel their urges
and your shadow dances on the edges
I still climb to high places
my breath tugging at my throat
so I can dangle my feet from imperiling ledges..
That part of you in my point of view
telling me to stand tall even when I feel small
It tells me to wear my heart out on my sleeve
and at times, I’m even brave enough, to turn it over in ink
All from watching you
You’ve lived honestly in front of me
I’ve learned from watching you that it’s important
to question what I think
And when life seems hopeless or off kelter
I use your wisdom as a filter..
You taught me to paint the world
with love and humor
The sweetest moments I remember, are of us
drenched in our own laughter
And when there is heavy silence
your music fills my ears, sooths my soul..
and relieves my fears
the same way it always has
for all these years