whole body

Once I held my breath

And waited patiently

As though that would make me a saint

I rejected beauty where it was in the form

Of gruesomeness and pain

Thinking I could pull God apart

And discover her love

Somehow separate from the rest of her body

A body that I have begun

To know better now

Like I’d know my own

Aware of the places that hurt

And the places that excite and cry out in ecstasy.

Her body is perfectly flawed

And irrevocably Holy

Her beauty encompassing

All that is “pure” and all that is “lost”

And equalizing them with a single breath

A breath I do not hold so much any more

But savoir

With no attempts of capturing it

A breath that yields to every breath

That ever danced before or after it

Bringing me home to the oneness

Of her whole body

A body that begs to understand itself

The way I trace my abdomen and hips

With my fingers hoping to fully embrace

The magic and wonder

Of my seemingly separate body

Hoping to capture the whisper

Of my “highest” potential and grace

As if it weren’t marbled into my whole essence

As if I weren’t just another piece of her

Whole perfectly flawed body

an anthem

You know what I remembered today?…
It’s okay to want to be alone
It’s okay to take yourself away, to practice what you are
or what you want to be.
It’s okay to dance alone in the candle light to a familiar beat
one that feels like a retreat and brings all the best parts of you to the surface
Lets you shine in the darkness where no one may notice… but you will.
You’ll be a bright shinning ball of light if only for a moment,
the stars will accept you as one of their own.
They’ll adore you and respect you.
It’s okay to be fearsome and brave
and scare all the negative notions stalking you away.
It’s nice to shed those garbage thoughts like dirty clothes
and get naked like it’s just you and your soul and it’s endless prose
urging you to move till you feel everything stop chasing you
and nothing unrighteous touching you.
It’s okay to fall in love with who you are
and take buckets of that love and shed it on another
surely it splashes off you anyway
and seeps into all the cracks and crevices of your life
like a sparkling liquid that will harden into glue.
All because of you.
All because you danced.
All because you took a chance, because you took a stand,
because you realigned, often, perhaps even hundreds of times.
Because you were steadfast, you’ll change in the future
yet admired your past.
It’s good to point this out sometimes
because sometimes we forget…
It all keeps moving, growing, building, flowing.
It’s all so easy to see when you’re alone.
When you’re alone you’re truly home
free to relax or rearrange, if you don’t like the way your home feels
you’re free to tear down and reclaim.
Free to place little reminders on the windowsills and mirrors
free to be emotional or relieved,
free to even change what you believe,
free to feel safe even amidst uncertainty
safe because you always have some where to go, somewhere to be
somewhere to call your own. Just close your eyes
and let your breath bring you home.

morning meditation

kenziesnyderman.com

Mountains sit like Deities in the window
Urging stillness, in my peripheral
I’d be wise to let them urge me
Let them show me, let them be me

It’s not common practice
to sit and wait for nothing
and linger in the moment
in fact we have been conditioned, not to, that it’s lazy

My breath is steam, as I clutch my tea,
it melts into the morning

I could travel a thousand miles,
right from where I’m sitting
But I resist
I stay and visit
the moment takes me in like a dear friend

Man, I’m glad I didn’t miss it
It may seem silly, may seem awkward
But I’m glad I finally accept the offer

5 Ways to Wake up Without Caffeine

We all have to get up sometime. Some days it’s easier than others. We wake up we stumble through the house like Zombies to the shrine our coffee pot lives on or the instant water heater and stacks of black tea. The caffeine kiss bringing us back to life like “true-loves “ lips. Then there are those of us that can make it up and out of the house fully functional on just the notion that caffeine is waiting loyally for us in the near future, on the way to class or work , that favorite coffee hut or faithful gas-station energy drink. For some this is a tactic in motivation, to assure that we get up at all and go to that very early destination. I’ve used this tactic myself and it was very effective until that fateful day, that I kept missing my opportunity and my coffee break never came. The coffee hut was robbed and/or burned down, I was too frustrated and indecisive to pick a new coffee hut, “they might not get my cryptic drink order right and then that would really be it” (The only thing worse than no coffee is the wrong coffee!), can’t go to holiday or micky-dees cause I’m too much of a coffee snob.. So I had to face it.. It wasn’t going to happen that day and I felt defeated.. “This is ridiculous, I’m a monster,” I thought. I have to try to quite caffeine..again (Like I have done hundreds of other times.) I am not saying I’ll never enjoy a London Fog or Soy Cappuccino again or slug a cold cup of black coffee desperately after losing track of time. Now I enjoy caffeine but am not depending on it to make or break my day. That’s where the following five ways to wake up without caffeine came into play:
1. Sex. We all know its works. Whether it’s partner-ed or solo, sex spikes our brain full of dopamine and oxytocin which puts us in a good mood, gets the blood flowing and the brain churning. Plus it gives you that happy “gotcha-some glow.”

2. Yoga. Start your day with five minutes of yoga. It calms your nervous system, focuses your mind and revs up your metabolism. You can do this in your bed or on the floor. Here is an easy A.M. Sequence:Seated meditation, seated side reach (each side), seated palm press, standing palm press. This gives you that moment right when you wake up to choose what you want to think about and focus on rather than just throwing yourself out of bed and straight into your racing thoughts and plans for the day. Rebalance, refocus and recharge. Then get out there and own the day!

3. Music. I made myself a Good-Morning Sunshine mix. And sometimes before the clothes even go on that jam is bumping out of the cd player, gets you moving and grooving and screaming the lyrics to the soundtrack of your favorite memories, triumphs and empowering messages!

4. Shower. Drag your stiff body into a nice hot shower first thing and let your body wake up in a gradual, soothing way. Practice self-care, make a gratitude list, or set your intentions for the day, make those shifts in attitude and thinking that will bring you up and feed your passions rather than negative notions that drag you down and stress you out. Start off clean, in body and mind.

5. Aromatherapy . Use aromatherapy in the form of essentials oils, a couple drops at the bottom of the shower, or an aromatic body wash or facial cleanser to awaken your senses and energize your mind. Or if you don’t have time to shower try an essential oils roll on or make your own. Citrus, Eucalyptus and rosemary are all great scents that motivate the nervous system.

These are only a few ways to start your day in a positive non-addictive-assholish way! What are some of your morning routines that make it easy to avoid or live without the caffeine?

 

black tea revelation

Thoughts stare back at me
in a reflection on black tea
Guess you never know when you’ll run into yourself
steam swirls
circles
and curls questions sink and melt
Tea leaves float the surface like tiny boats and striving hopes
that sail right through the harshest storms
shapes and forms reveal themselves
in the midst a revelation is born
One Solid shining notion
Pulled from a pool of liquid black
Sparkles hug the curves of optimism
the way the lunar shadow hugs the edges around the inside of my cup
Reminds me of the tides and all life’s cycles
Roll with the downs
Roll with the ups
You have to be just as brave to finish as you were to start